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""I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it."--Steven Wright "

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"I had a linguistics professor who said that it's man's ability to use language that makes him the dominant species on the planet. That may be. But I think there's one other thing that separates us from animals "

we aren't afraid of vacuum cleaners.

Don't let Krusty's death get you down, boy. People die all the time, just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow! Well, good night.

Homer

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When I read about the evils of drinking,I gave up reading.

Henny Youngman

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The doctors X

rayed my head and found nothing.

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Learn to enjoy every minute of your life. Be happy now.Don't wait for something outside of yourself to make you happy in the future.Think how really precious is the time you have to spend,whether it's at work or with your family.Every minute should be enjoyed and savored.

Earl Nightingale

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There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more.unknown

There are two types of people in this world, good and bad. The good sleep better, but the bad seem to enjoy the waking hours much more.

unknown

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