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"After finding no qualified candidates for the position of principal, the school board is extremely pleased to announce the appointment of David Steele to the post."

Philip Streifer, Superintendent of Schools, Barrington, Rhode Island

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Every man has his tale of woe. Unfortunately in life there is more woe than tail

Rodney Dangerfield

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I had a linguistics professor who said that it's man's ability to use language that makes him the dominant species on the planet. That may be. But I think there's one other thing that separates us from animals

we aren't afraid of vacuum cleaners.