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I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three.

Elayne Boosler

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Frank Rizzo, ex

police chief and mayor of Philadelphia I've always thought that underpopulated countries in Africa are vastly underpolluted.Lawrence Summers, chief economist of the World Bank, explaining why we should export toxic wastes to Third World countries

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You have to stay in shape. My grandmother, she started walking 5 miles a day when she was 60. She's 97 today and we don't know where the hell she is.

Ellen DeGeneres